Monday, June 8, 2009

Mother's Day Minus Mom

Disclaimer:
| This post is late intentionally.....not out of negligence, only out of needing to get it "just right" and out of consideration for others, by no means do I ever want to dampen your joy and celebration of the wonderful women around you |

As much as a don't want to admit it, Mother's Day for me will now always be bittersweet. Twelve years ago my mom was in a coma, tired from the battle against the cancer that had developed in her brain, but at the same time waring to survive. Her faith never ceased and her hope never wandered from the Cross.

At the time I was young, 18 to be exact. Never could I imagine the odd and wild things I would long to talk about with my mom in the years to come. Things that only become important later on in life's journey; getting married, babies, labor and delivery, stretch marks, health history, parenting, faith, death, family dramas, you get the gist.

This past week I was reminded again of mom as we submitted an application to top up some insurance. Cancer will be with me forever, a part of my history, a facet that pops up in the strangest parts of your days and in the most mundane of things - like insurance.

In no way would I sit back an idolize my mom simply because she's gone. No one is perfect, and neither was she, but on random days when the kids are wild and the house hasn't been cleaned and it's 5pm and you're still in your pj's sometimes there is deep longing in my heart to hear, "you're doing a great job & I'm really proud of the woman you've become." Sometimes hearing that from your mom can do wonders for you on days where you feel like crawling under a rock and sometime you don't know the importance of things like that until they're gone.

As I look back and think about my mom I realized I learnt a lot from her:
*The ability to have faith that never ceases
* Have fun and laugh
* A passion for Greek food | I (heart) it!
* Have a few good girlfriends to do life with - it makes a world of difference
* Value every moment
* Make sure to keep dreaming

On the downside, mom also so generously gave me:
* A round mid-section | no washboard for me
* A tendency towards stretch marks (joy!)
* A stubborn will power to do things on my own | this has potential to get me trouble

My world will never be the same and hopefully I'll be a better mom for the things I learnt and the things I wish I had had time to learn. Now being a mom to my own girls I hope and pray I can instill into them everything they'll need to be the best woman God designed them to be.

Sending love to all you mothers today and everyday. And if you read this, I hope you're inspired to take some time to encourage a mom around you...young, old or somewhere in between...you have no idea what it may do for their day.

| Photos |
From Left to Right

Madelyne & I at her Preschool Mother's Day tea | May 2009
Mom, Josh (bro) & I, our last photo together | a few weeks before she entered Heaven's gates
Mom & I back in the day | I was two!

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4 comments:

Unknown said...

Oh Lisa...I so remember being by your side when you were going thru this difficult journey...my heart went out to you then and it does now! And it really makes me think I take my mom for gratned so thank you for sharing this because I will cherish each day I have with my mom here on earth. And I know you know this already but your mom would say that she is SO proud of the woman and mother and wife that you have grown into!!!

Char said...

What a beautiful post. Your tribute to your mom was so elloquently written.

Your Mom would be so proud of the woman you have become! You are an amazing wife, mother and friend to those who know you.

Keep walking each day in faith, expecting bigger things each day the sun rises.

Tawn said...

so lovely ... thanks for sharing. when I look at you, I see a confident, intelligant, woman of God. There is so much your mom would be proud of!!

Jenn VH said...

Lisa;
Thank you for posting your heart. You are such a lovely lady, a loving Mommy and a sweet friend that I cherish. I loved seeing those photos--the one of you laughing with your Mom and Josh is so carefree and happy; the one of you and your Mom makes me see Madelyne in you; the one of you and Madelyne shows me two very sweet, special ladies. Bless you, friend--you're doing a GREAT job! Have a fantastic time with your hubby in the Big Apple!
(((hugs)))
Jenn