Monday, June 8, 2009

Mother's Day Minus Mom

| This post is late intentionally.....not out of negligence, only out of needing to get it "just right" and out of consideration for others, by no means do I ever want to dampen your joy and celebration of the wonderful women around you |

As much as a don't want to admit it, Mother's Day for me will now always be bittersweet. Twelve years ago my mom was in a coma, tired from the battle against the cancer that had developed in her brain, but at the same time waring to survive. Her faith never ceased and her hope never wandered from the Cross.

At the time I was young, 18 to be exact. Never could I imagine the odd and wild things I would long to talk about with my mom in the years to come. Things that only become important later on in life's journey; getting married, babies, labor and delivery, stretch marks, health history, parenting, faith, death, family dramas, you get the gist.

This past week I was reminded again of mom as we submitted an application to top up some insurance. Cancer will be with me forever, a part of my history, a facet that pops up in the strangest parts of your days and in the most mundane of things - like insurance.

In no way would I sit back an idolize my mom simply because she's gone. No one is perfect, and neither was she, but on random days when the kids are wild and the house hasn't been cleaned and it's 5pm and you're still in your pj's sometimes there is deep longing in my heart to hear, "you're doing a great job & I'm really proud of the woman you've become." Sometimes hearing that from your mom can do wonders for you on days where you feel like crawling under a rock and sometime you don't know the importance of things like that until they're gone.

As I look back and think about my mom I realized I learnt a lot from her:
*The ability to have faith that never ceases
* Have fun and laugh
* A passion for Greek food | I (heart) it!
* Have a few good girlfriends to do life with - it makes a world of difference
* Value every moment
* Make sure to keep dreaming

On the downside, mom also so generously gave me:
* A round mid-section | no washboard for me
* A tendency towards stretch marks (joy!)
* A stubborn will power to do things on my own | this has potential to get me trouble

My world will never be the same and hopefully I'll be a better mom for the things I learnt and the things I wish I had had time to learn. Now being a mom to my own girls I hope and pray I can instill into them everything they'll need to be the best woman God designed them to be.

Sending love to all you mothers today and everyday. And if you read this, I hope you're inspired to take some time to encourage a mom around you...young, old or somewhere in have no idea what it may do for their day.

| Photos |
From Left to Right

Madelyne & I at her Preschool Mother's Day tea | May 2009
Mom, Josh (bro) & I, our last photo together | a few weeks before she entered Heaven's gates
Mom & I back in the day | I was two!

Posted by Picasa